Much to our surprise on Friday our immigration approval arrived in the mail.  Yay!  We didn’t expect it for at least another 3 weeks.  We’re doing the dossier paperwork scramble.

My sister also got her confirmed embassy date for Ethiopia.  So my sister, my dad, and I will be traveling to Ethiopia at the beginning of September.  I get to go along!  Last time I was 9 months pregnant with Jack and actually delivered him while my sister and parents were in Ethiopia to pick up my nephew.  God’s way of telling me that there was no possible way to go along:)

Matt and I celebrated our 9 year wedding anniversary yesterday and today Jack turned two.  It’s an exciting and crazy time in our life.

We’d love to get our dossier finished before I fly over the big blue ocean…

To find out more about our adoption journey, head over here.

So you may have noticed that not much has happened on Give Me Neither this morning.  We had our fingerprinting appointment for our adoption.

I did have a moment of panic when the lady said that my birthday was showing up differently in the system.  I had emailed them about this months ago.  So off she went to talk to the immigration officer.  When she returned she asked if I had my passport along.  No.  Any other photo id beside your driver’s license.  No.  Off she went to take to the immigration officer.

Everything worked out fine and our fingerprints are done.  Now to send out requests for references letters, gather the rest of the paperwork, and wait for our immigration approval.  We’re getting there.

Every step along the way makes it feel more real that we’ll one day bring our daughter home.

I just finished the book There Is No Me Without You: One Woman’s Odyssey to Rescue Her Country’s Children.  My sister gave me the book before my nephew came home from Ethiopia and it took me two + years to muster up enough courage to read it.  I’d start it and stop because it was just too much for me to handle.  It deeply affects me.  I read it because it changes who I am and the way that I look at the world.  Amazing story…

On Saturday, my mother-in-law and I went to a few fabric stores to look for fabric for our baby girl’s quilt.  My MIL makes beautiful quilts for each of the grand kids.  With our two boys, we waited to be surprised at birth with boy or girl.  This time around we know… so we’re getting a jump start on the special quilt.  At the 1st stop we found the fabric along the top (floral print) and I fell in love.  We then headed to the 2nd store and found most of the other fabric we need.  I have to find a few more and Mom can get started.

It makes it feel more real and my eyes flood with tears as I think about it.  Sometimes I busy myself so I don’t think have to think about to much…

We have our fingerprinting appointment on Wednesday and then in a month or so our immigration paperwork will get approved.  Then we can send the paperwork over the big blue ocean to South Africa.  I’m excited, but I also know that the time is coming where whatever control we thought we had falls between of our fingers.  We’ll officially be in The Wait and I’m not very good at waiting.  It’ll be hard not to put our life on hold… we really have no idea how long this wait will be.  Patience and trust…

I’m excited that we’re moving along…  I look forward to holding our little girl in my arms and looking into those big brown eyes.

Read more about our adoption journey.

Things are moving along…

Last week in the mail we got our letters for a fingerprinting appointment.  It’s scheduled for the 1st week in August.  Yay!  We’ve begun to gather the papers needed for our dossier.  The dossier is a big packet of important papers that will eventually head over the big blue ocean to South Africa.

I feel this mounting anticipation as each part of the process moves forward.  I long to bring our daughter home, to know who she is, to care for her, and love her.

Kaden looks forward to taking his baby sister home.  His latest remark is that she is still being made.  I just wonder what goes on in his mind.  He’s learning so young the beauty of all different kinds of families.  He wonders if his baby sister is in my tummy and I can just hear his brain churning, trying to wrap his mind around this.  How do you explain these big realities to a 4 year old?

We’re praying for our daughter, her mother and those that surround her…

We’re busy working on our paperwork…

We’re praying for trust in a God that is bigger than we can imagine…

We pray that God continues to move in our hearts and show us the things that he cares about…

We pray that we have the courage to follow…

So it’s been a while since I last updated you on our adoption journey.  We’ve been at a bit of a crawl over the last 2 months.  Our home study is complete and we’re waiting to meet with our social worker to go over it, go over the immigration form and fill it out (I-800A), and get started on our dossier.

It’s been over two years since our last trip to South Africa and that leaves an aching inside me.  We fell in love with that country and the people that we worked with there.  Our next trip there will likely be to pick up our daughter…

We’re waiting for things to happen to make this prayer of our hearts a reality.  The process of adoption isn’t an easy one, but I look at my nephew (adopted from Ethiopia almost 2 years ago) and I know that it’s worth it.  A few weeks ago I was in low spot and emailed our adoption group at church about the things that pressed on my heart.  What a beautiful group of people.  One friend from the group recommend the book Chasing Daylight: Seize the Power of Every Moment by Erwin MacManus (it’s not even about adoption).  The crazy part about is that I had a copy at home.  I picked it up a couple of years ago and never finished it.  So I picked it up again and it’s just the message that I needed.  I want to seize the moments of each day even when it’s not easy and not comfortable.  The way of Jesus doesn’t often lead to easy roads, but it’s good and beautiful.  There is something sacred about the process itself and I don’t want to miss it just because the outcome is not clear.

So for now we’re sitting tight and praying that God makes things happen.

The plan is that I’ll travel with my sister to pick up my niece from Ethiopia.  When she picked up my nephew, I was 9 months pregnant with Jack and actually had him while she and my parents were in Ethiopia.  Crazy timing!  I think it was God’s humorous way of telling me that there was no possible way that I was going along.  My hope is that it’ll work out this time.  Seizing those moments each day and living a story with my life…

Just a little update on our adoption process.  We just had our 3rd in-office visit for our home study.  In two weeks we’ll have our visit in our home and our case worker will get to meet our little boys.  Our case worker Belinda told us not to fuss about our house, but I work best with a deadline.  I see it as motivation to do some organizing that we’ve wanted to do.

We moved into our house over 3 years ago.  It’s the house that my grandparents lived in most of my childhood.  With the house we also gained some of my grandparents’ clutter and a fun things like a tractor, a beautiful plot of land, and daily memories of them.  We’re getting to the bottom of their clutter, except now it’s been replaced by our clutter.

We renovated the house before we moved in with the help of our families.  We had a contractor do a few big projects like removing a wall, building the cabinet frames for the kitchen and bath room, and retrimming the downstairs.  We tore down wallpaper in EVERY room, sometimes multiple layers, painted, put in a laminate floor in the kitchen and dining room, pulled up old carpet, trimmed the upstairs, and the list goes on.   Well, we’ve mostly renovated the house… a few of the finishing touch projects aren’t done.  We ran out of steam and so we’re slowly and I mean slowly finishing up our projects.  Matt’s working on the cabinet doors and they’re beautiful.  I’ve grown accustom to not have cabinet doors.  We don’t have anything to hide:)  We have some quarter round to put up in the bathroom.  We haven’t had a bedroom door for 3 years.  We don’t have closet doors in any of the bedrooms.  It makes it a challenge to hid the baskets of clean, unfolded laundry:)

So anyway I don’t see the home study and getting the house ready as a negative thing.  It just gives us a little incentive to work on a few projects.

After the home study while we wait for fingerprinting and immigration approval, we’ll be working on our next leg of paperwork called a dossier.  It’s the packet of papers that will actually go to South Africa.  Which reminds me… I need to renew my passport.

On Monday we received word that adoptions from South Africa will be delayed because of a systems that need to be put in place in order to comply with the Hague Convention.  These changes will need to take place in South Africa before any referrals can be made.  The Hague Convention is a international convention put in place to protect children.  It’s design to make sure that the best interest of the child is considered with each intercountry adoption.  It also serves to protect children against exploitation and trafficking.

So it’s a beautiful thing and one that we fully support.

Intercountry adoption can be full of uncertainty.  We’re part of the pilot program with South Africa, so we know that everyone involved will be learning as we go.  We’re so thankful and honored to be part of this new program.

Yesterday while driving to my parents’ house, I was thinking, because that’s what I do when I drive.  I muled over this new information about the delays and anxiety started to creep in.  My thoughts wandered to praying, praying to God to guide our decisions.  Sometimes when you pray you feel like you’re speaking into nothingness, this was not the case this time.  In the midst of my praying, the radio station that I listen to put on the information about their day sponsor.  It was a story about a new mom celebrating that her daughter’s adoption was finally complete; the long journey was finally over.  I’ve never heard a day sponsor regarding adoption before this.  In that moment, God reassured me.  This is the path he is laying out for our family.  Praise God for listening to the cry of his daughter’s heart.

Where are we in this journey right now?

We’ve completed two of the four home study visits.  The 1st three are actually in the office with just Matt and I and the last one will be in our home with our boys.

A look ahead…

Our case worker will complete the home study within a couple weeks after the last visit.  It will be sent to South Africa in our dossier to give a picture of our family and allow them to place a child that will best fit into our family.

We’ll then submit our I-800A (a form) to get immigration approval.  It will take about a month after that to get our finger-printing appointment.  Then another 1-2 months for the approval to go through.

You’ll be able to follow our road to adoption anytime by clicking on the image above in my right side bar.

Things are moving right along toward the adoption and I’m getting more and more excited.  Kaden still asks all the time if you’re picking up his baby sister today.  Sweet boy.

We’re moving on to the home study part of the adoption process.  We still have to finish up our family autobiographies, but it’s on hold right now while I complete my nursing continuing education credits for my RN license.  I’m such a procrastinator.

Our 1st home study visit will be this coming Monday.  I’m excited to meet our social worker in person, a little nervous too.  After we meet with her together.  Matt and I will meet with her separately in the office and then will have the final visit in our home with our two boys.  So that’s where we stand right now.

This morning we received a message that the Federal Adoption Tax Credit has been extended through 2011!  What wonderful news.  The financial aspect can be such a huge barrier for many to adopt and this is one way that it makes it within grasp for us.

The current adoption tax credit has been extended until the end of 2011.

• The value of the adoption tax credit has been increased by $1,000 from $12,170 to $13,170.
• The increase is “retroactive,” meaning that any adoption occurring after January 1, 2010 is eligible for this higher credit.
• The credit is now refundable. This means that even families that owe zero taxes can receive the full tax credit in the form of a tax refund to help with their adoption-related expenses in the first year (This is the biggest change as it allows adoptive families to receive their full tax credit in the first year after their adoption.)

As we move through this process, I’ll continue to share with you ways that I learn to help with the financial aspect of adoption.  It takes stepping out in faith, but He will provide.

If you’re interested in more about our road to adoption, you’ll always find information in the right side bar (if you click on the image that looks like the one at the top of this post.) or here.

We’re so close to finishing our formal application.  It’s already been processed and approved, but we just have few more supporting papers and our family autobiographies to put together.  Then we’ll be assigned a case worker and start the home study part of the adoption process.

It’s starting to feel more real and I can’t believe this is really happening.  Sometimes you pray and pray for something and then you finally realize that your prayers have been answered and it takes a while to sink in.

I think about our little girl every day.  What’s going on in her little life?  Is she still in her mother’s womb?  What is happening in the life of her mother?  I pray for them both….

I think about her when we singing in church and sometimes I’m completely overwhelmed with emotion.  It’s funny how the simplest words can speak to your heart.

You brought this peace
You brought this peace
You brought this peace
Thank you, thank you

Your love is everywhere
Your love is everywhere
Your love is everywhere
Open me, open me

You kept me warm
You kept me warm
You kept me warm
Thank you, thank you

My prayer for our little girl and her mother.

These are few of the lyrics to the song “Thank You” by Glen Phillips.

Kaden our 4 year old is ready to bring his baby sister home.  He’s busy drawing pictures of the planes route to South Africa and has already proclaimed that he wants her to sleep in his room.  Almost every time we go anywhere he asks if you’re going to pick up his baby sister.  No little buddy it’s going to be a while yet…

If you’re new here, a couple weeks ago I shared with you about our hopes to adopt from South Africa.

We’ve been busy for the last month filling our forms for our formal application.  What does this involve?

• Doctors visits and lab tests
• References
• Answering big questions about our childhood, why we want to adopt?, the community we surround ourselves with
• Answering big questions about the child we hope to adopt
• Gathering financial information
• And the list goes on

One of the challenges has making determinations about the child that we’ll adopt.  There is something beautiful about allowing that decision making to be made by God, but that’s just not as clear with adoption.  We’re interpreting where we feel him leading us.  It brings up all sorts of questions about what we think we can handle regarding health issues and emotional issues.  There’s something about it that just feels wrong.  It’s humbling and reveals our humanness.  I love what one of our friends from our adoption group at church said, “you can’t make a wrong decision when you following God’ heart by taking care of the fatherless and the orphan”.  I love that.  Matt and I step forward in unity and trust that God will take care of it.

And he does.  I’ve starting to make a little income from my blog.  A couple weeks ago I counted up the income that I’d be getting in the next couple of weeks and it was $13 from the exact amount we need to send in all those papers and start this beautiful journey.  Praise God.  When I start to wonder how on earth are we going to come up with the money needed for this entire process? I reflect on the ways God is carrying us already.  He’s been opening doors and he’ll provide…

Give Me Neither came about last May while pondering this question:

How do we make less money stretch further so we are able to pay our bills and continue to give to others?

I’ve learned so much and I LOVE doing this!  I love helping you save money because it has a ripple effect.  For me it’s not about accumulating more, but freeing us up from the burden of money.  Freedom leads to thankfulness and thankfulness to generosity.

You may be wondering about the children in the picture.  It’s a picture of Kaden and his friends in South Africa.  Every time I take a look at that picture it reminds me what it means to live richly.  I’m not talking about monetary wealth, but rather the relationships and experiences that bring depth and beauty to life.  The children of South Africa have deeply impacted the person that I am today.  I need to be reminded of the lessons I’ve learned daily.  My adventure of frugal living is not so I’ll be able to accumulate more (that’s where ‘live simply’ comes in).  Rather that I’ll be able to give more, an outpouring of my thankfulness to God.  The thing with giving is that it changes me as much if not more than the person receiving it.

Matt and I lived in South Africa from January 2004 to January 2005 and we fell in love with the country and the people of South Africa.  We worked at a childrens’ home Tshepo Ya Bana “Hope For Children”.  When we returned from South Africa, we explored the possibility of adopting a little boy that we loved dearly.  We were unable because the US and South Africa didn’t have an adoption relationship.

It overwhelms me to think of the way that God’s beautiful plan has unfolded.  We’ve been blessed with two little boys since that time.  We’ve continued to hope and pray that one day it would be a possibility.

And it is!

So saving is taking on a whole new dimension in our lives.  We’re just beginning this road to adoption and have no idea where it will lead.  But we’re trusting and moving forward in faith…

So right now we’re filling out a ton of paperwork and running around town to doctors’ appointments and dropping of paperwork.

Meanwhile I’m more determined than even to make our money stretch as much as we can…

Frugal to the Fringes

What do I mine by fringes?

It’s two fold…

• God calls us to step out to those that have been pushed aside in our society, pushed to the fringes of society, the marginalized, the oppressed, the fatherless, the widow.  If we don’t care for them, who will?  Every little bit helps.
• Frugality in all dimensions of my life, to the outer fringes.  I have so much abundance.  How can I cut back so that I’m able to give more?

My ultimate dream… that Give Me Neither support us living in South Africa…

What I’ve learned is that dreaming is beautiful and you just never know…